Angel Day tradition: straight to heaven

I think I need one more day. One more day to process and be in shock and be so so sad for the community in Connecticut. It just doesn't feel right posting pictures of outfits and crafts and recipes like nothing happened, like I'm still in that completely frivolous holiday mood. I still am in a holiday mood, and I think we should be, but I just need one more day to sort things out in my mind. I hope you'll bear with me for one more heavy post.

What does feel okay to share is one of my very favorite traditions. As you know, last week I commemorated Angel Day, which is the day my beautiful mother had to leave this earth and become an angel. On that day, right at sunset, I went to the cemetery. 

I carried with me white carnations, some of her favorite candy, and cream & gold balloons {the colors I think of when I think of heaven}.

Attached to those balloons was a letter to my angel mother, telling her about my year, and pictures. Mom, I'm a real life teacher now, and I love it. Mom, we're making some big changes, and even though you already know what they are, we want to tell you anyway. Mom, I miss you.

I sent them up into the sky. I want to send them straight to heaven, and I know heaven is beyond the sky, but the sky is as close as I can get. 

So I take deep breaths, and wipe my tears, and just let go.

There's a power in just letting go.

And I watch the balloons until they're out of sight, until they reach that heaven I imagine they go to.

And I recommit. I recommit to be a little kinder, a little more giving, a little more selfless and loving. Because I know the best way to honor my strong, sweet mother is to live the legacy of love she left. It is my biggest aspiration to be like her one day.

"Everything I am or ever hope to be I owe to my angel mother." Abraham Lincoln

I love you mom.

what matters most

This time of year can get really hard for my family. Lots of memories, the best and the worst. I don't think I want to say any more about it right now, but yesterday I asked Sam if we could just have a quiet evening at home. We turned on the lamps and burned our favorite candle (yes, my favorite candle is from Walmart. It smells like winter, but happy.). He worked on his model football stadium, and I read my book. There were so many good things to come out of that October, and I don't want to miss a single happy memory this year.

Happy Sunday. Let's all be a little kinder, work a little more diligently, and remember what matters most.

the routine

On Sunday mornings, we opt for a few extra minutes of snuggles, so we rush to church almost late every week.

After church, we nap and take walks and eat lunch.

On Sunday afternoons, I visit a certain grave in a cemetery. It's quiet and peaceful, and spring comes early there.

Then we have a family dinner, come home to our little lovenest, and procrastinate the start of our week together.

It's a good routine.