when service makes the world a little brighter: hosting a playdate

I'm so excited to share today's post with you.

My long-time readers know that the holidays can be pretty sad for my family as we commemorate the death of my angel mother. It's impossible to go through Halloween without thinking of three days before in 2009, the day she went from apparent good health to collapsed in the hospital with only a few weeks to live. It's impossible to go through Thanksgiving without thinking of the last Thanksgiving we shared with her - it was one of the last days she was up in her wheelchair, and one of the last days she remembered who I was. On my birthday I think about how we buried my mother in a frozen cemetery the day before, how I had never felt less like a child and more like an adult. A few days later was the bleakest Christmas I have ever had.

That's why mormon.org's Christmas campaign is so beautiful this year. It's all about doing small but meaningful acts of service. When people reach out and help others, it lights up the entire world. Whether or not you share my religious beliefs, I think it's a message we can all agree on.

Nobody was better at service than my mom. When I was thinking about a small act of service to share with my readers today, I went through quite a few possibilities. Should I clean out my closet and donate the extra clothes? Should I volunteer at a homeless shelter? Make care packages for the military? Deliver cookies to some neighbors?

All of those are great ideas, but then I thought - What would my mom do?

She would host a play date.

We ALWAYS had somebody else's kids over at our house. My mom was so great at giving parents a break to go on a date or get work done or just take a nap. And she was so great at loving every single child she came across. The best way I know to keep my mom's legacy alive is to try and be like her.

Of course I'll never be as wonderful as my mom in a million years, but I thought - this is one thing I can do. I can host a play date. I can give parents a little break, and I can love these kiddos.

So I did. It was a small act of service, just a few hours on a Saturday morning, but I really loved it, and I think these sweet kids did too. And that's the great thing about service. It helps you, it helps the person being served, and it helps the world be a little brighter. And it went surprisingly well, considering there were eight children under the age of three running around my small apartment. ;)

To see more examples of my Savior Jesus Christ and the ways he served people, click here. For more information about the #LIGHTtheWORLD Christmas campaign (launches officially this Friday!) click here, or visit Mormon.org's Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram page. And press play below to see the video of our little play date.

Thank you to Mormon.org for partnering with Silver Lining to create this video and blog post today. The content and opinions expressed, as well as my belief in the power of service, is all my own.

differences

This blog post is to show off three important things. Well, some of them are important, and some of them are pictures of succulents.

Which brings us to item number one: my cactus and succulent obsession. It doesn't look like it's going anywhere anytime soon. Sam doesn't understand my tendency to take pictures of every single artichoke agave I come across, but when you get lovely photos like these, no other explanation is needed, right?

 Between pictures of succulents and all my #azsunset iPhone snaps, I pretty much have Instagram covered for the next three years.

The second thing I have to share is that I happened upon this little scene yesterday in the nursery. While I was putting Claire's laundry away, she crawled up on the glider and started reading to herself. Between this and the sight of her in her snuggly footy pajamas, my melty heart is feeling especially melted these days.

The third thing I've been thinking about is differences in marriage. There's a quote in Wuthering Heights, where Catherine says of Heathcliff, "Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same." 

It's such a sweet sentiment, but honestly, I don't usually feel that way about Sam. We're total opposites in so many ways. Our backgrounds are so different. Our likes, our dislikes, our home lives growing up. How and where we were raised could be a book called "Case Studies in Opposing Childhoods."

On some days, we disagree about the silliest things. Where the measuring cups should go in the kitchen. (In the little drawer to the right of the oven.) How many times one should press the snooze button in the mornings. (Zero.) Baby names. (For a couple that's not pregnant, we spend an inordinate amount of time debating baby names.) Political candidates and Saturday agendas and who gets Claire for the last hour of church. Really, you name it, we've got different opinions about it!

By all accounts, we should be constantly fighting. I come from a long line of passionate, stubborn strong-willed Richards women, after all. But we don't. I keep remembering a little moment from one of our first dates, before we were officially a thing. We were sitting across the table in a cupcake shop, each with a hot chocolate in hand. Mine was mint, and his was regular, and we had strong opinions about whose was best. But that's not what we were talking about.

"Look," he said. He was looking down and fidgeting with the corner of the table. Almost like he was embarrassed? Or shy? "I know it's not like the cool thing to say -"

He looked up. He was almost blushing. Definitely shy!

"-But what I really want out of life is to go to work every day, and then come home and be with my wife and kids. I want to do the whole parent meetings at school and soccer games and whatnot. That whole thing. That's what I want most from life. Just a family that I love."

Maybe we're more alike than we think. Maybe, deep down, whatever the most important parts of our souls are made of, we're the same. (Catherine Earnshaw was onto something after all.) And maybe our differences balance and compliment each other. And maybe that's a great thing. 

On our next date, when we were saying goodbye, he leaned in and gave me a kiss on the forehead. It was the sweetest, most understated gesture, and right at that exact moment, I was done for.

And now this has turned into a blog post about Sam and how crazy I am about him. There is a 100% chance my brother will give me flack about this blog post when he comes for Thanksgiving. Oh well. Sam is fantastic, the end.

But I can't let you go before I tell you about this necklace. I wanted a little mint peridot necklace to commemorate the month I married Sam, and absolutely I love this one. The necklaces are small and strong and I swear they're more sparkly than any photo captures. It's from the Hey June shop (I want these in rose gold), and my dear friend + shop owner, Bonnie, is offering 20% off with the code BROOKE20.

The other necklace is for my sister to commemorate the month in which they got to adopt their little boy. The code is only good through Saturday, so get one for your bestie and your mother-in-law and yourself today!

Okay FINE one last picture in all its grainy glory:

You see why I had to include it. And NOW it's the end.

anniversary

Four years ago, I woke up early. I walked through my parent's quiet house and looked at all the carefully ironed shirts lined up in a row, all the suitcases in hallways from people who had come to be with us. I didn't feel a single trace of the wedding nerves or jitters. I only felt so so excited. My aunt helped me curl my hair. I clasped my mother's pearl necklace on at the base of my neck.

Sam woke up at our new apartment, where he'd been sleeping for the past two days. He had the wedding day jitters. He walked through our empty apartment and pictured how it would look a week from now, when both of us lived there. He carefully shaved and put on his tuxedo.

I remember we called each other. "Um hi. Do you want to get married today?"

The rest of the day was honestly a blur. I remember the ceremony was beautiful and simple. I remember it was hot but not too hot. I remember my dad crying. I remember there was a little gap in the receiving line that night. Sam and I looked out at everybody sipping their Italian sodas and thought, "Everyone we love is here." We were so fortunate to share the day with our close friends and our family.

Thank goodness for great wedding photographers who help us remember the details of our day.

It was the best best best day.

A lot of marriage is work. A lot of it is easy. A lot of it is feeling like you're the perfect fit for each other. A lot of it is realizing just how different you are. A lot of it is wanting to be together always. A lot of it is appreciating your time apart. A lot of it is the easiest thing you've ever done. A lot of it is the hardest thing you've ever done. A lot of it is saying I'm sorry. A lot of it is laughter. A lot of it is tough. But all of it is love.

Happy four years, Sammy.
Here's to another four more. And then fourty more. And then eternity.

that right there is love

There was one night, when I was seven months pregnant, that I woke up with an excruciating leg cramp. They had warned me about pregnancy leg cramps in the pregnancy books I was dutifully reading, and this one lived up to every painful expectation. It was like a charlie horse times a thousand. I sat there in bed, gasping and yelping and desperately trying to straighten out the muscles in my leg and foot. What the pregnancy book didn't tell me was that my muscles would suddenly become stiffer than concrete, and straightening them out would be impossible. I realize I'm making this little leg cramp sound overly dramatic, but it's going somewhere, I promise.

As I sat there in bed, gasping in pain, Sam jolted awake and, in his panicked half-asleep state, thought I was going into pre-term labor. Our friend had just gone into early labor, and I think it was on his mind. "Brooke! Brooke!" he said. "Is this it??!?!"

He jumped out of bed and haphazardly started throwing things into a backpack that we might need. A phone charger. His wallet. Keys. An empty folder. (How useful an empty folder would have been during pre-term labor remains to be seen.)

At that moment, the cramp abruptly stopped.

"Sam, stop," I said. He had one leg through some shorts he was hopping into. "It's fine. Just a leg cramp."

"You're not in labor?!" he demanded. 

"Nope. Just a leg cramp."

We looked at each other in the darkness. Me and my gigantic belly and my hair all over my face, him with half a pair of shorts on. It was silent for a second, and then we started laughing.

We laughed as I stretched out my leg. He dropped the backpack on the floor (alas, it wasn't the empty folder's day to shine after all) and crawled back into bed. We spent the next hour or so whispering about "wow" and "what if" and "aren't you glad it wasn't" and "I can't wait to meet her, but not like this" and "don't you ever scare me like that again." I eventually fell back asleep, but Sam was awake most of the rest of the night, just thinking about the realities of becoming a dad, and our future.

And that right there? To me, that's love. Panic attacks at 2am, and bleary eyes at work the next day, and the dreaming and the whispers together and the half-packed backpack on the floor. That's love. And I'm so glad I get to share it with Sam.

anniversary.

I remember looking at my husband on our wedding day and thinking "I cannot possibly love this man any more than I do right now." And then one year went by, and I looked at him and thought "Now we're not just bright-eyed newly-weds who thought we knew the meaning of love. Now we actually do know the meaning of love." And then another year went by, and I looked at him and thought "We really had no idea, did we? How deep this love thing can go, and how nice it is to have when the going gets tough." And now, yet another year later, I've resigned myself to the fact that I'll probably never know how deep this true love thing can go. Because it just keeps getting better.

Happy three years, sweetheart.

ENGAGED! And it was quite the adventure!

The plan was simple enough: my brother Covey would take his Ellie up the mountain to the spot where they first kissed. Dad and I would head up earlier, get a few things set up, and then hide with my camera. I would take pictures of the on-one-knee deed.


The glitches:

• Do you know how hard it is to transport a delicate red rose up a rocky mountain on an ATV?! We came up with model after model of ways to wrap and protect it, and finally went with model 5C, cotton swabs and a container and towels galore.
• The trail was covered in half mud, half ice. It was a dangerous combination, and I spent most of the trip threatening Mother Nature within an inch of her life if anything happened to me or the little apple inside of me.
• The time we stalled on the edge of an icy cliff. Okay, we were like four feet from the edge, but still. Dad said "if I yell bail right, you know what to do!" (WHAT!?)
• The time we took the wrong fork in the road. We realized our mistake pretty quickly, but when we were turning around, Covey and Ellie zoomed past us. Wait! They can't beat us there! What about the rose and the tablecloth and the fact that we're supposed to be hiding with the camera!

When we finally made it up there, Covey had to distract Ellie with some pretty grand romantic gestures (if you know what I mean ;) as I snuck up into the treehouse there. I had a backpack with hot cider, cookies, a vase, the rose, and a tablecloth. I was about to set it up when I realized the little table was covered in ice. Thus began the crazy act of trying to scrape layers of ice off the table while living in constant fear that Ellie would turn around at any second and our cover would be blown. (I acknowledge that I've watched too many episodes of Chuck lately.)

Finally, I got the table set up and practically jumped down out of the treehouse. Then dad and I had to run and hide in the grove of trees. It was at that second that I realized I WOULD NEVER SURVIVE IN THE HUNGER GAMES. My snow pants swished with every step, I couldn't see because bare branches kept snagging my hair and pushing it in my face, the crunchy snow was the loudest sound I'd ever heard, and to top it all off, I got a bad case of the ill-timed giggles as we ran. Yeah. I would last about five seconds in an arena.

Of course everything turned out beautifully in the end. They came down from the treehouse and walked to the ridge that overlooks the valley. Covey was very sweet, and Ellie is beautiful, and they are so so happy! I have wanted my brothers to get married for years now, and it's finally happening. We are so excited to have Ellie in the family!

^^that one might be my favorite. Ellie's reaction was so cute^^

in the treehouse

And now for the wedding in May!

2 years.

Two years ago today, it was warm and sunny.
He wore a tux and I wore my mom's pearls.
We beat death by getting sealed together for all eternity.
It was the best of all the days.

recreating the picture: 24 years later

The second I saw the picture, I knew. We had to recreate it.

My dad graduated with his masters degree from BYU in 1989. This is a picture of him and my mom at graduation (she had one child and I was a tiny secret in her belly).

So this weekend, at graduation, we tried to recreate the picture. Basically the same place, same angle, same pose, but years apart.

I love looking at this and comparing all the little details. What we're wearing, the people in the background, the quality of the picture (I edited mine to have a slight vignette effect). And I can't help but wonder if I'll have a child one day that recreates this picture. What they'll look like, their clothes, the people in the background, and how awesome photography will be then.

What do you think? 

Have you ever recreated a picture?
Would you ever?

Maddie + Wes | Engaged

What I liked best about photographing this couple was how playful they were. In between shots (which turned out to be some of the best shots) they were just playing around. Couples like that are so fun, and it's easy to see how in love and happy they are.

What I liked second best was that in just a few weeks, they'll be joining the contingent of married cousins, and I could always use another married cousin or two around here (I had exactly the opposite opinion when I was single, but now that I'm married I'm kiiiiiind of on a campaign.).

Right??

Are they cute or what?