Silver Lining: Do YOU have better grammar than a fifth grader?

July 18, 2013

Do YOU have better grammar than a fifth grader?

In theory, summers are the best time for a teacher to plan new units and projects because they are unencumbered with the day-to-day tasks of students, grading, recess duty, etc.  Does this mean I'm actually being productive and getting things done in my classroom this summer? HA! No way!  But I sure am making a valiant effort pretending I’m doing something useful as I watch yet another episode of White Collar and repaint my nails.

What I do keep thinking about this summer is grammar, which tells me
a) I have serious relaxation problems or
b) possibly something more deep-seated,
c) I need to get a life, and
d) grammar? really?

And now, I present to you, the grammar of my 5th graders last year. Can you spot what's wrong in each one?



Your the best teacher ever! 
Sometimes I think I failed in the you're/your battle with my students. But then, as I scroll through twitter and facebook, I realize it's more of a worldwide misuse epidemic.

u r the gr8est teacher ever 
Attention parents of the world: 99 out of 100 fifth graders do not need cell phones. Look what happens.

You’re the best teacher I’ve ever gotten. 
And you’re the best student I’ve ever HAD.

You’re not the worst or best teacher ever. 
And you are going to ace neither your end of year tests nor your ACT unless you work on your neither/nor grammar, in which case every possibility in the world is open to you.

Yore the beste techar in the warlde. 
I had some seriously DARLING kids last year who couldn’t spell a single thing, bless their souls.


And there you have it! 
Are you smarter than a fifth grader?

9 comments:

  1. hahahaha! this is hilarious. :)

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  2. This is hilarious! Most of the people on my Facebook feed are NOT smarter than a fifth grader ;D ha ha!

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  3. so great. did you ever use these as teaching opportunities? that could be fun!

    K

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  4. Oh my goodness, this is definitely a pet peeve of mine although I would be more inclined to excuse it if it were a mistake made by a 5th grader as opposed to an adult! A lot of my friends are NOT smarter than a 5th grader either! :)

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  5. This made me feel slightly better about my grammer. However i bet you'll find an error in this comment, im useless!

    Your vs you're = The worst!

    x Eloise - Jazzlipsandtulips

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  6. Hee hee! And hooray for White Collar! :)

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  7. Haha, this is dear :) As an English major, I'm often irked by these little things, too--but even more so when it's adults. Sigh....although I can't say my grammar is perfect on my blog ;) Keep enjoying your summer!

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  8. I spend the first couple of days with all my high school students going over your/you're, their/there/they're, to/too/two and they still mess it up in their papers constantly. So yah, don't sweat it if they haven't mastered it in the fifth grade.

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  9. this is hilarious :P also, you don't have problems - every human should care about grammer! (considering they are old enough to understand)

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