Silver Lining: a different kind of love letter

December 13, 2012

a different kind of love letter

Dear mom,


This is a love letter. One of the greatest types of love is the love between mother and daughter. You loved me so much and cared for me so much. If I'm one one-hundredth of the mom you were, I'll feel successful.


You were the most selfless person I ever knew, mom. Remember how, as you were laying on your hospital bed, as people came to visit you'd ask all about them, shower them with love, make them feel like a million bucks, and let them cry on your shoulder when they were crying because you were dying? That's the kind of selfless you were.


Today, it's been three years. Three years since you became the type of mother that watches over me from above. The type that can't call after school ends each day, the type that can't give me a hug, the type that can't bless peoples lives directly like you used to do every single day. 


But that doesn't mean you're not with me. Remember that one day? Just walking down the hall of my elementary school early in the morning, getting my lessons ready before the kids arrived, and all of a sudden I could feel you. Walking down the hall next to me, like it was totally normal, like you did that every day. 


Maybe you are there every day, helping my class, guiding me. 


Mom did you sit at the empty chair we saved for you at my wedding? Or were you standing right next to me when I got married?


I love you mom. My favorite compliment is "you remind me of your mother," even though few in this state can give it to me. Sam and I are trying to be so good, trying to follow your example and do good things for others while we're here. 


I love you mom. Happy Angel Day. Thanks for being here with me.


Brooke




14 comments:

  1. This is so beautiful, Brooke. There is no doubt that you have one proud angel mommy.

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  2. This is amazing brooke. You are an incredible woman!

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  3. We love you dolly. I know what you mean about moms watching over us in ways that they could not otherwise. I feel the best of blessings have come into my life because I was trying hard to honor my mom and not disappoint her hoping that every day she was able to see my world unfold. I can't speak for your mom, but as your auntie . . . I would be the proudest mom in the world to have a daughter like you. And the coolest part is because of Sammy I kind of do! We love you both. Lorell

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  4. This is so beautiful Brooke. I was thinking of you and your mother just the other day. I knew that she passed away around this time. You are so very amazing and wonderful! Of course she is with you and so proud of you. I hope your school year is going well, I remember that was a really challenging year for Erin to teach school (she taught at Cherry Hill Elementary in South Orem, it's a title 1 school and she had a lot of ESL students and it was TOUGH; it was also her first year of marriage, and it was a trial and a blessing both. She put in 18 hour days as I recall! Please take care of yourself (stay well), I love you! Merry Christmas. If you and Sam ever need to get away, you know you can always stay here---I have a spare room, it's
    Katie's old room! :o) Love, Mama O.

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  6. Be right back. Gotta go get a new box of tissue ...

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  7. so beautiful. why did i read this at work. i can't cry at work.
    love you brooke. i'm sure you are just as amazing as your mother.
    even though i never knew your mom when i see pictures of you together i automatically think that you are just like her.

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  8. crying in the chicago airport.
    i love you brooke
    and i can't wait to meet your mother someday

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  9. What a sweet sweet letter! So beautiful

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  10. This is so beautiful. I'm sure your mom really is closer than we sometimes realize. Sending lots of love on this bittersweet anniversary.

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  11. Beautiful. Thank you for so openly sharing these feelings. I feel priveleged to read them.

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  12. I tried three times to get through this yesterday. Nope. Couldn't do it. Today I finished reading it with blurry eyes. Love you.

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