Silver Lining: My Students Say the Darnedest Things {Vol. 2}

April 17, 2013

My Students Say the Darnedest Things {Vol. 2}

Persuasive Essays:
"Do you feel sorry for Africans? I know I do! That's why if I had a million dollars, I'd donate it to a school in Africa."

Using a made-up word and context clues:
"The nurse and the baker met secretly in the shadows to flurk every morning until they were hot and sweaty." (flurk meant race?)

Overheard at recess:
"I don't think I'd do CPR if Mrs. Jones* fell over. Mom said I have to be nice to everyone, but she's too fat to kiss."
*name changed

After Jason came to visit:
"Mrs. Emery, don't tell anyone, but I have a crush on Jason. Sara does too. Jordan said he does too, but I think he's joking."

Reading about illegal shark hunting:
"That's weird that hunters dump the extra parts of the shark back into the sea, because Native Americans used every part of the shark."
"Um. Most Native Americans didn't hunt shark. Do you mean buffalo?"
"Oh yeah. I always get those two mixed up."

The Maturation Section:
"Have a good weekend!"
"I don't think I will. My mom's taking me training bra shopping, because I'm in THAT stage."

Same girl: "My boobs are growing by the second!" {They're not.}

Same girl, blowing down her shirt: "Sometimes it gets really hot down there in the middle of class."

After maturation day: "The teacher said we couldn't giggle when he talked to us. I didn't want to giggle - I wanted to throw up!"

{I could write a whole post about maturation day. It was hands down the most hilarious day of 5th grade.}

Speaking of my awesome kids,
they perform at Hope of America tomorrow night,
and you should come!
You can watch me bawl through the whole thing :)
Photo credit: Elisabeth


  1. Good ole maturation day! I remembering dreading that so badly! ha!

  2. These are my favorite posts. Oh my, those kids are hilarious!! I had already had "the talk" with my mom, so I knew everything already. Made it not as bad. haha!

  3. This makes me want to be a teacher! Buffalo and sharks are practically the same animal, right?

  4. Flurk looks like it means something completely different! LOL

  5. Oh man those are some crazy saying. Especially flurk. I love listening to kids!

  6. We were talking about alliteration one day and putting words with each name. the students came up with Mrs. Ford farts. everyone thought that was hilarious and I was glad they were getting the concept. But one adorable boy stood up and said " farting is no big deal, everyone does it. I just farted and no one even realized." the class got really quiet and he turned beet red when he realized he had just outed himself. It was so funny! oh how I love 2nd grade.

  7. I have nominated you for the Liebster Award. Please come check it out
    xx xo

  8. Hilarious post! It looks like so much fun to be a teacher.
    Feel free to check out my budding blog, I would love advice and new followers!
    Slightly Strange [}

  9. ahahhahahahahahha....hilarious, I actually laughed out loud :P

    Now, pardon my ignorance, but what is maturation day? We don't have that in Australia, but it sounds funny!

  10. So funny. Kids are awesome because they just say what they think.


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